I spent a good portion of today lost in my feelings, trying to figure out how to change a situation so that it might have an outcome that was more desirable to me. It was exhausting. I started to think…I’m not taking very good care of myself today, emotionally. I began to brainstorm what I could do to help myself. Eat healthy. Check. Workout. Check. Meditation? Nope, hadn’t tried that one yet.
I went looking for mediation videos for submissives. You probably just got a chuckle out of that. That’s not exactly what I found, but I did find an incredible video put out by Jason Stephenson (my absolute favorite in the world of guided meditations!), titled “Surrender Meditation”.
My favorite part of this meditation went like this:
“Whatever it is, it is out of your control, and this can be deeply frightening at times. In much of the Western world we are taught that control, objectives, and contingency plans are what will keep us safe. You probably have a plan for any given area of your life. A back up plan in case that doesn’t work out. And, an absolutely worse case scenario, and how you would cope with it. There is nothing wrong with this, and in fact, thinking strategically usually lowers anxiety and results in excellent outcomes. But what this mindset doesn’t teach you is that you can’t control everything. Even if you are a centered, compassionate being, this is deeply unsettling. And yet, past this fear, lies peace. A peace that is impossible to disrupt.” ~ Jason Stephenson
I will stop trying to control the situation which I find myself presently in and just let it be whatever it is going to be. My heart is open. My mind is at peace.
Thank you to all of you who showed me great support and compassion today. You mean the world to me.
Much love,
nora
Finding Strength in my Submission 
Just found your blog today and I am very much enjoying it.
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Thank you, my new friend!😊
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Hi Nora, been following your recent posts and I didn’t know how to comment as I went down a similar path as you did. Except my request for the other person to be my Dominant was flat out rejected. It took a lot of courage on my part to request that and I felt heart broken that it was denied. My husband like yours had been extremely supportive during that time. I was an emotional mess to say the least.
I knew going in that even if I got rejected, I would not allow the preexisting relationship die. So that relationship has now evolved to father-daughter with somewhat a twist. There is still D/s element in that relationship. The part where I am cared for, the part where I am seen as a submissive are all there. No rules, no rituals. Just habits that evolved naturally overtime showing that we care.
Give your friend and his wife room to think and strengthen their relationship before they can help you. The D/s that you wanted may not work, but still try to preserve the friendship you once had. Let it evolve naturally. You may need to let go of certain desires to help you see what it is you really needed.
Hope that helps. Best of luck!
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Thank you, nutty kitten….you give really good advice. Thank you, my friend❤
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I saw your other post Nora. I could tell you were disappointed and that it messed with your emotions. It was sweet that there was so much support out there for you.
I wasn’t sure what to say because I have never been through anything like that myself. I can’t imagine involving anyone else in my relationship with Ben. Whereas I know Simon would have had a different view entirely. But that’s why I am not with Simon.
But as in the case with any disappointment, it takes a while to recover. Enjoy all the good things in your life. I am sure you have lots of things that bring you comfort and ease the disappointment.
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I’m glad that your meditation helped! Know that many of us are here should you need someone to vent to!
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Thank you, Michael! Waking up to a comment from you always brightens my day 🙂
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I just want to point out that it is almost noon. Some of us have been up for 6 hours. 😜😜😜😜
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LOL….well, it was 8am my time, sassy boy!😘
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😂🤣🤣😂
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I think it’s been too long since your Queen spanked you 🙂
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I am glad that meditating was helpful. I think anything that brings you peace in time of stress and quietens your mind has to be good 😊
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Thank you, missy! I am looking forward to trying it again today. I tried one early this morning that was designed for starting out the day on a positive note, but I could not stop my mind from thinking about the day and my to-do list. I think the mid afternoon ritual may be more helpful for me.
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When you crash and burn emotionally, it can be ugly and sometimes the only thing to do is just ride it out and try to be at peace with yourself and if meditation is called for, get all Zen and meditate until the moment passes.
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I’ve only tried meditation a handful of times prior to this, but it was incredibly helpful yesterday. I’m going to try it again today to see if I might want to incorporate it into my daily routine.
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