An imposter?

A few weeks back, an email came to my inbox regarding a seminar about Imposter Syndrome.  Curious, I clicked on the email and learned a bit about this syndrome, which became a point of focus in research amongst high achieving women (though now, it has been learned these symptoms show up equally in women and men).  Essentially, Imposter Syndrome occurs in relation to an event or series of events, in which the individual doubts their skills, achievements, positive traits, accomplishments, etc. The individual often feels like a fraud.  Sound familiar?

I have accomplished a few things during my time on this big, beautiful planet.  I am proud of my work, though I sometimes fear that my achievements are far less than they should be.  My focus has always been more on human connection, rather than fortune or fame.  Helping make people’s lives better, one person at a time, is a personal credo of mine. 

In any case, this morning I feel like a bit of an imposter.  I have a BIG thing coming up in my professional life and I find myself plagued with doubts.  Am I good enough?  Am I smart enough?  Am I worthy?  Do I matter?  Do my contributions matter?  Ugh.  I just can’t seem to shake the feeling that I am an imposter in the midst of a lot of intelligence and talent. 

Sometimes, I feel like a weed, growing amongst a field of beautiful wildflowers.  Or the ugly duckling swimming amongst the swans.  You get my drift….

I will do my best to pick myself up, face this challenge head on, and prove to myself that I am good enough.

And, for those of you who share my passion for musicals… you might enjoy this uplifting tune 😊

XOXO,

nora 

PS. I’ll be back to my regularly scheduled program of submission, spankings, and all things kinky shortly. Bear with me, my naughty friends 😉

59 thoughts on “An imposter?

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        1. I do believe in myself, most of the time. I guess I just had a bought of self-doubt and self-pity this morning…worried about how I will perform. After some good talks with both Daddy and Sir, I think I have my head on straight again 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  1. I don’t know what to say about such irrational feelings, but they’re familiar to me and can be debilitating. If only you could see yourself through others’ eyes.

    I’ve never gotten much into musicals, but I love songs. This one was inspiring. Brought a tear to the old eye. XO

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am really glad you enjoyed it, Franz. It is one of my favorites. Thank you for being supportive. I know I can do this…but at the same time, am plagued by self-doubt, you know? I really appreciate the support. XOXO

      Liked by 2 people

  2. You’re no imposter! You’re a badass who’s too hard on herself. It’s a normal thing to be self-critical, but seriously, you’ve earned what is coming to you! Don’t doubt yourself. I know it’s easier said than done sometimes, but as long as you put forth the effort and do your best, you absolutely deserve the things you’ve earned. You’re going to do just fine!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Sure thing! It’s true. And yes, that makes sense! Haha. I’m sure you’ve earned it in both contexts. You’re a badass, but you’re certainly a bit willful and wayward at times and must be corrected. 😝 Being put over a knee and having your bottom reddened seems to generally do the trick for you!

        Liked by 1 person

          1. Well, I think it’s good to be willful and wayward sometimes. Conformity isn’t all it’s cracked up to be in every case. Plus, I sometimes wonder if the “punishment” isn’t part of the fun for you sometimes. 😉

            Liked by 1 person

  3. Y’know what Nora, You are fabulous! I’m not being unnecessarily supportive here, I am stating a fact. You are fabulous. Everything you do, you throw 100% in and give it your all. Nobody could ask you for more. I hate this terminology of 110% there is no such thing! 100% is all we have to give, if you do that, you can kick your imposter syndrome up the backside and out the door. We all have doubts about our abilities etc. but you have earned your professional status through sheer hard work, and an iron clad will to succeed so that you can help others. Chin up Darling, Shoulders back, chest out. Be proud of you and your achievements to date! I’m sure there will be plenty more where they came from. Validation comes from within sweetie, not from outside. Validate yourself, you earned it! Much love my most gorgeous naughtiest friend! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Gemma…I promise, I’m trying! I generally do feel pretty self-confident but myself all in a tizzy today. I will take your advice…shoulders back, chest out (nipples covered😘)…and just go for it! Much love, my sexy stiletto wearing friend!!!💋💋💋

      Liked by 1 person

              1. Yeah … that’s actually a thing… a friend of mine did that, she wore stilettos to her anniversary party and tripped getting out of the cab, I won’t go into graphics, but suffice to say, she still walks with a limp and a cane even now, 20 years later. Stick with the floppy’s Nora! No breaking of the Nora is allowed! We need you! MWAH!! Love you girl!!
                Hope you’re imposter has buggered off too! 💋💋

                Liked by 1 person

                1. Oh wow, so sorry to hear about your friend! While I use to wear platform sandals when I was younger, I can honestly say I have never slipped my feet into stilettos, nor do I plan to…because I would be that girl, tottering precariously between making my legs look sexy and breaking said legs. LOL. Thankfully my imposter feelings have buggered off! I am feeling strong and confident this morning. Much love, my friend! XOXO

                  Liked by 1 person

                  1. so very glad to hear the Imposter has done one! My friend is no longer my friend anyway (I should have said ex friend) lol She baled when I got divorced (She’s catholic she was horrified) Apparently I should not have gotten it on with Tom and I should have tried to save my marriage. (which had been over and done for some time by then). Anyway, she never used to wear stilettos until she saw me wearing them, and I was running in them, guess she thought she could do the same. lol Karma is a bitch… 😛 xx (By the way, she is married to my ex-husband these days.) Karma really is a bitch with Stilettos on 😂🤣😂🤣

                    Liked by 2 people

                    1. Yeah, she was welcome to him to be honest Nora, man is a complete ….. just fill in any fitting expletive here lol She commiserated with him when I had him arrested, she went to visit him while he was on the psych ward being evaluated and then put him up when I refused to take him back. Apparently I was the worst person in the world for behaving in such a terrible way towards another human being. I told her to F right off when she started banging on about us all being God’s children and forgiveness will cleanse our souls etc etc etc… anyway upshot? She is now extremely unhappily married to my ex and I am extremely happily divorced and playing life my way, so I reckon its One for the Atheist team and none for the God squad! 😀 Whoop!

                      Liked by 2 people

  4. What a coincidence, Nora. Just this afternoon I listened to a talk on the radio about imposter syndrome, and how many years ago it was called the ‘imposter phenomenon’, but has been changed to ‘syndrome’ so people could get treated for it by psychologists (because it’s called a syndrome, it can be added to the DSM handbook). Even heard Michelle Obama talk about it 🙂

    And, just for the record, I know you will be great at that big thing coming up!
    ~ Marie xox

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I read with interest your comments on the imposter syndrome. I freely confess that I had never heard of it. Here, for what they are worth, are my thoughts on it, as a retiree who has accomplished some things on this planet, but probably not as many as he should have.
    You question your ability to achieve something? If you do not question it, then how much of an achievement can it be once you have accomplished it? Evidently, it was no challenge. However, if it is a true challenge, and you are not sure how you can actually complete it, then how does that make you an imposter? You do not have to be precisely certain of exactly how you are going to accomplish something to be reasonably confident that you can. And projecting an attitude of confidence in yourself in that circumstance is not being an imposter. It is simply having a positive attitude, a valuable leadership asset. No one can do everything. If you work with others, some will be more suited for some tasks, some more suited for others, while you are more suited for still others. When obstacles must be overcome, teamwork often prevails, and it is greatly aided by a positive attitude.
    I’ve not read much of your blog, but I’ve read enough of your comments to know you to be an intelligent person. Do not worry about being an imposter, put self doubt behind you, and just go get it done.

    “I’ll let you all in on a little secret,
    If I can share with you a thing or two.
    If you just act like you know what you’re doing,
    Everybody thinks that you do…”
    ~ Joe Walsh, “Lucky That Way” (2012)

    I hope to hear about your project.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Silkenlash, Thank you for this thoughtful and insightful comment. I think that your point – if I do not question my ability to achieve this, how much of an achievement is it- carries great merit. While I was indulging in self-doubt yesterday, I am feeling strong and secure in myself today and I will work hard to carry that feeling with me throughout the week. This particular endeavor is a solo mission, and I must rely on my own intelligence and hard work to carry me through to the finish line. I would love to share more about my project, if you are truly interested, but I prefer to keep that bit of specific information private from my blog. Please feel free to email me if you ever wish to converse in a different space. Again, thank you for this supportive response to my momentary lapse in self-confidence….it could not have come at a better time. With respect, nora

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Although I don’t know you, you come across as intelligent, kind, strong, and so much more. You are consistent in your writing which makes me believe you are genuine and not an imposter.

    Would you please take a deep breath and show them how wonderful you are.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Honestly I struggle with this so much as well … and it’s really hard to open up about because I then worry that people will think I’m fishing for praise … when the truth is I literally can’t believe what they are saying to me when they do say it … my brain says ‘they have to say that they’re your friend (etc)’

    your blog is my absolute fave and I look forward to every post … I understand you won’t believe it but you are an inspiration xxxx

    Liked by 2 people

    1. WOW! Thank you, Shropsgirl! And welcome to my blog! I am always so grateful to “meet” one of my readers and your support means everything. Your inspiration comment has left me blushing….thank you!!! XOXO

      Like

      1. To be honest I’ve ‘lurked’ for a really long time … not in a weird way but I’m single… I would love what you post about life with your daddy but not within my experience… so I just keep to the sidelines and keep my fingers it might happen for me xxxx

        Liked by 2 people

        1. Well, I LOVE lurkers! So glad you decided to leave a comment. There are a few ways to meet someone in the D/s lifestyle. There are various chat rooms, forums, and FetLife (which I have never actually done, but know of others who meet fellow kinksters that way). I know it is so hard to meet someone, and especially someone who shares your kink. I will be crossing my fingers that you find that special someone! XOXO

          Liked by 1 person

  8. I have found that with every year at work, I seem to come across this sensation that there are so many fresh younger things, straight out of college, eager to come in and prove themselves. Sometimes I have found it intimidating. But year on year, I see that actually experience, people skills, consistent working habits, reliability, ability to cope with stress have been more important to my employers than the cutting edge skills some newer employees bring. At the end of the day, when they can’t be bothered to turn up on time, sit and work solidly, share credit with other team members, and adapt to challenges – the initial enthusiasm those who hired them felt over their apparent skill set wanes.

    At the end of the day, we prove ourselves by our consistent efforts and by proving we understand people and use that in a positive way to keep the team achieving results.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. sending many hugs your way, put those negative thoughts to bed and never let them wake up again, you are amazing! You are accomplished, strong, intelligent and have a beautiful soul. I know whatever you set to task before you, you will rock it!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. you my dear friend are no imposter, you are a wonderful example of shining your light in whatever way it chooses to be seen and I love you for that. Also this is on my phone as one of my favorite hype songs LOL

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Hi Nora,

    You probably know this but every successful person I’ve read about confesses to constant fears that they are not worthy. I finally gave up trying to become adequate and have just accepted it.
    Some of the classical music artists that have written about this have been Luciano Pavarotti, Vladimir Horowitz, and many others. Ansel Adams was plagued with fears of inadequacy until his last photograph. He was always terrified of going bankrupt despite his success.

    I’m glad your project went well.

    John

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello, John! Thank you very much for this supportive comment. I do try to keep in mind what you are saying, as I know it is true. It is so hard in the moment when one is facing that big thing. Thankfully, things did go well and I am feeling quite accomplished these days. Again, thank you for the supportive comment! It means a lot. XOXO

      Like

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