And the results are in!

Hello, my kinky readers,

You might remember my recent experience with receiving an unsolicited dick pic for the first time (if not, read all about how my dick pic cherry was popped here).   This ended up being a connecting experience and prompted some great conversation between myself and some of my readers.  I know that this can be a rather jarring, scary experience for some…but I didn’t experience it that way (which probably has a lot to do with the fact that I am anonymous in this space).  I’d say for me, it was about 25% shocking, 15% confusing, 50% downright funny, and I will admit…about 10% sexually exciting (again…do not interpret this as me wanting future dick pics people!).  

It also prompted me to want to have a better understanding of the experience of sending these kind of pictures (which I learned is actually called “cyber flashing”).  In order to accomplish this aim, I set up a quick, anonymous survey and was grateful that eight brave (kinky) souls participated.

While there are a gazillion ways to analyze qualitative data, I am going to sit back and let the participants speak for themselves.  I want to thank each of you for being brave enough to participate and helping all of us to better understand this from your perspective.  Personally, I greatly enjoyed learning more about this phenomenon.

* A note about the results.  R= response, not respondent.  I have mixed up the responses to add an additional layer of anonymity to the participants. 

Question 1: What is the motivating factor in deciding to cyberflash? (for example, validation? taking flirtation to the next level? sexual connection? something else?).  

R1: I have only done this with one person, in terms of me being the person flashing. I have instructed women to flash for me quite a few times and it is certainly pleasurable to direct a cyber flash (choosing in detail the body parts and pose and state of undress). The only time I did it, I was ordered to purchase a pair of girls’ panties and provide a selfie that left little to the imagination about what was underneath. As I recall, I was also ordered to give myself several very hard spanks and provide a photo offering confirmation of my bare reddened boyish fanny.  

R2: For me, it’s about sexual connection, but as a masochist, a negative and insulting reaction is also a major turn on.

R3: Requested by dominant.

R4: I actually haven’t done much cyberflashing that wasn’t requested or sent to a person that I knew would enjoy it. Really haven’t sent that many dick pics in general except for in flurries with people I chatted/sexted with here and there. I should have learned my lesson then b/c it wasn’t spectacularly received.  It seems to happen when I’m highly worked up sexually and fantasy is invading reality. Drunken impulsiveness sometimes plays a role.

R5: Brain a bit absent when horny. I like being seen.

R6: Sharing a sexy connection with a flirtatious young lady who has sent me something as well.

R7: Sexual connection, flirtation, thinking about the relationship you have built with that person and visualizing them as you wash cyber part vigorously in shower, bed.

R8: Phishing, to hook up.

Question 2: Please describe the experience of creating a cyberflash image. What are you feeling/thinking as you set the scene and take the picture? Are these feelings/thoughts solely of a kinky/sexual nature? Is this purely about a sexual rush, or something else?

R1: I sometimes take these pics before jacking off in the shower. Just generally horny and wanting to take some pics I could use for my Fetster profile, etc. However, I have been worked up and cyberflashed using in the moment pics before too. Mostly it’s just me fantasizing about this and that and the person I’m going to send it to. It is basically about the sexual rush, yes.

R2: In the example above, the sense of being exposed and being required to present myself in that was felt very humiliating and also, in fantasy at least, that I was putting my trust in another person who was in control of me. That feeling was VERY arousing, especially with the psychological feeling coupled with the feeling of the smooth girl panty fabric being stretched by my very erect bare penis.

R3: Yes, definitely sexual rush. Careful to maintain anonymity (no ID-able background, etc.

R4: It is 100% sexual, at least for me. The knowledge that a girl has seen, and perhaps might acknowledge, my penis (positively or negatively) is amazing.

R5: Solely sexy thoughts. Trying to make it look good.

R6: Yes…YES…and YES to something else, I have also cum on a photo of a naughty deserving young lady as well.

R7: Thinking that they will enjoy putting words into pictures and use the image as stimulation for their own needs.

R8: Sexual excitement

Question 3: What are you feeling/thinking after you send the cyberflash picture?

R1: Hope that they like it and respond.

R2: After I send them to people who want them, I’m excited and can’t wait for feedback. After I send them to people who didn’t request them (only 2 people so far), I felt slightly excited, but also nervous that I had done something wrong and, furthermore, cheesy.

R3: I do not recall because it was quite a while ago. I would need to be made to do this again and to be told to remember all of my feelings and that exact moment.

R4: Regret.

R5: Feel fulfilled, satisfied. No remorse really.

R6: The excitement of what I just did and the anticipation of what I would get back.

R7: Generally happy that I know they will appreciate my effort to give them something close and personal to me.

R8: Nervousness

Question 4: What is the desired outcome of sending a cyberflash image?

R1: Sexual connection, physically or online.

R2: To be doing as told, and the exposure is exciting.

R3: Any positive or negative reaction, really. As a masochistic switch, I’d get off on being praised and admired or insulted and humiliated. I’ve had both reactions; some girls like my girth and confidence, while others seem to be repulsed by it and enjoy humiliating me, which also turns me on as much.

R4: I would say that the desired outcomes are arousal, which is instant, and also the possibility of being required to pose in different ways, especially humiliating ones, in the future.

R5: A strong sexual rush of sharing something so intimate with a likeminded (and willing recipient) fellow kinkster of the opposite sex (my preference).

R6: They achieve happiness in knowing a part of me is now in their hands and mind.

R7: Hooking up.

R8: The desired outcome is to titillate the recipient and hopefully inspire them to respond in kind and perpetuate the sexual interaction and/or fantasy.

Question 5: Any other thoughts you would like to share about this experience to assist others in understanding this (increasingly common) phenomenon?

R1: I do believe that this should almost always be done without an identifying facial image so that there is little risk of reputational damage. I will say that I have found that for many women, the experience of being made to bare their bodies in very intimate, exposing ways can be HIGHLY arousing. The anonymity of it can make a woman feel very free to explore her fantasies further and further, which can make her very very horny. I do know that some women just melt at the feeling of being controlled and being told what to do. And photos need not be limited to mere innocent boob shots or even wide-open legs spread images. There is no reason not to push/explore further. Consider, for instance, requiring her to stand with her back to a full length mirror and have her part her legs and press her finger into her tight little asshole. (and then of course, push the button on the camera). My experience is that the more exposed, even ashamed, she feels the hornier she will get.

R2: I would never do it in a rude, or even unsolicited way. It really does scratch my exhibitionist itch.

R3: I don’t really have much else to say. It’s not something I’ve thought deeply about. It’s mostly just a horny, impulsive decision that’s fine when done to someone who’s cool with it, but really fucking stupid when done to someone who you really don’t know like that.

R4: Be cautious and use safe, sane and consensual practices when you engage in this activity!

R5:  Unsolicited are not on, build a relationship then, of mutual agreement to send between both parties. I guess if you don’t know them that well and it comes up during conversation then judge their reaction. If not agree … Don’t.

R6: Never have I, nor never will I do this!

---

I hope you enjoyed learning more about the experience of sending dick pics!  And please… no nasty comments below.  I am actually quite proud of the brave people who responded to this survey.  I get it that sending real life dick pics is a serious thing (and that one can be charged criminally for doing so)…but come on, friends… if you can’t have a sense of humor about it here in my kinky space… 😉

XOXO,

nora

PS.  Bonus points to whomever comes up with the best penile euphemism…share your responses below!  I will get us started:  penis pop, meat on a stick, doodle dasher, bum tickler, flapdoodle, bald-headed sailor, one-eyed snake….  I could do this all day…..