Shopping for a Dominant

If you read my recent post (Daddy & I- The Talk) then you know that I am in the market for an on-line dominant!  This may sound silly, but I am really excited that my husband has given me permission to seek a dominant person who wants to engage in a power exchange dynamic with me.  I have spent a lot of time thinking about this and discussing it with Daddy.  I sure feel like a spoiled girl!  Not only do I have my dream Daddy….but now, I get to search for my dream Dom…..

naughty nora’s dream Dom

Wicked smart

Has an interest in spanking

Successful at whatever it is he does or did (it’s okay if he’s retired)

Is married (but is in a situation where he can engage with an on-line submissive)

Older & wiser than myself

Demonstrates consistency as a person and as a Dom

Has experience as a Dom, Disciplinarian, or Mentor

Is available to our dynamic on a daily (or almost daily) basis

Has a strong interest in discipline AND accountability

Is creative

Has an interest in rules, protocols, rituals, mantras, etc.

Supports me writing about our dynamic on my blog

Is willing to remain anonymous until trust is established

Enjoys reading, writing, and intelligent discussion

Enjoys giving his submissive assignments

Now… I only need to manifest this person into existence!

Am I missing anything, my friends?  Is there anything you would add to this dream Dom wish list?



17 thoughts on “Shopping for a Dominant

Add yours

  1. Yes yes yes! Question: how will the spankings from this dom be meted out over “the phone”? I love that you mention intelligence! Such an important one! I have no time or tolerance for dumb people. And I will not be dominated by someone below my intelligence level. I’m so happy for you! (I don’t know if the butterflies I got from this. We’re how I excited I am for you. Or just my little girl making her presence known by kicking)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Grace Marie! So…as to discipline and spankings… I will wait and see what this person has in mind (when I find him). I want to be sure that I don’t “top from the bottom” so to speak. I really appreciate you being excited for me…. I feel like I am on this big new journey!
      And… I bet those butterflies are that precious little baby in your tummy…she’s just waiting to come out and join the world 🙂


    2. Oh, and yes!!! Intelligence is very important to me. I need someone who can out-think me and won’t let me get around him with my cleverness (or, my tendency to argue a point to death) 🙂


      1. I’m about as ready for this baby to be out. As she is to be out. I also need my husband to out-think me. Before D/S I would come at him attorney style until either I won. Or he gave up. Either that or I would find a loophole or some other way to get my way. As my mother used to say “Gracie you would argue with a doorknob.” And she was right. So being dominated by my husband who is on the same intelligence level as myself. Has worked out well.


  2. Perfect framework to start shopping! ♥ The only other things I’d add is being really certain about your limits with this Dom in terms of your relationship/extent of control and what your personal limits are. I have a whole list of kinks which are rule outs for my partners because they are are hard limits for me. The things I didn’t think about when I started the process of searching for a Forever Daddy, but learned along my journey.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Succulent! This is very good advice. This is something that I haven’t had to think about as much, as Daddy and I have always been so in sync about limits. It will definitely be important to have a sense of what my boundaries/limits are right from the start. Thank you, my friend 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’ve had dealings in the past with ‘intelligent’ men. They are not as easy to find as you may hope. My advice would be open discourse via face to face online, you can see whether he’s googling his responses to your questions! Seriously, this is a thing and it’s happened to me. Texting, emailing etc, is all good, but it gives him time to find answers on google and then sound like he has a good working knowledge of the subject you are discussing. ‘Face to face’ video removes the opportunity and makes him think on the fly.
    Meh.. my cynicism is getting in the way here! This is absolutely amazing news Nora, I have no doubt you will find the perfect Dom for your needs, you are indeed a lucky girl! I am soooo excited for you!! 💖💖💖

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for this advice, Gemma! You have me remembering one of your recent descriptions of a man you met for a date…who admitted to you that he was googling answers to questions you had asked him! The nerve!!! Being intelligent, and being wise, with real life experience is very important to me. I need to feel challenged and I want to feel so much respect for this person…that I can really learn from them. Thank you for always supporting me, my sexy friend! You mean so much to me ❤


  4. I would consider throwing my hat in the ring, but you blew me off with #1 – Wicked smart. Maybe I was when I was younger? I have greatly enjoyed relationships with women who were in fact smarter. Not just IQ, but were highly verbal with a quick wit. I enjoyed the challenge of keeping up with them.

    Good luck

    Liked by 1 person

  5. All good advice! Make sure he is accountable to himself and holds himself to a high standard.
    Do not follow someone who does not hold themselves as accountable or more than they hold you. Good luck with your search!


      1. Holding myself accountable was something I struggled with a number of years ago. I was in a fuck it if it feels good do it mode. Then I met my Kitten and I came off autopilot. Now it is a balance between keeping her engaged and connected while doing what needs to be done, like personal workouts when she has already worked out without me, or household chores when she wants to craft. Bring accountable makes me think twice before buying donuts and often just saying no.


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