The question—what sorts of things create a climate where you feel submissive?—was posed to me recently, and I’ve spent much time considering my answer. What exactly is it that sends me hurtling into subspace and sends tingles to all the right places?
There are some obvious answers and some that are more complex. Let’s begin with the obvious.
As I have written recently, use of particular words and phrases give me cause to feel very submissive. Terms of endearment, such as “little one”, “little girl”, and “good girl” contribute, but also sterner endearments such as “young lady” or “little miss”. There are certain ways of speaking to me that I would also say push my submissive buttons, such as “I expect to see X, Y, or Z from you in the future”, or “It would please me immensely for you to….” And of course, the obvious phrases that lite any spanko’s fire, “you are well on your way to earning a spanking, young lady”, “I might change my tone unless you are looking to earn a sore bottom”, “I think a good spanking is in order, nora, wouldn’t you agree?”, or “Well done, little miss, you have just earned yourself some time over my knee.”
But there is much more to inducing my submissive mindset than simple words or phrases and this touches on the concept of a man’s style of dominance feeding my submission. This is unique to each dominant which I have encountered (not that I have encountered many) and speaks to a dominant’s way of being in the world. His intelligence, his self-control, his demeanor, his consistency, his creativity, his insight, his use of affection, his understanding of the mind and human behavior all influence the potential for his dominance to feed my submission.
His expectations and requirements are other elements which establish a climate in which I desire to gift to him my submission. In my mind, my Dom would push for excellence, would require the highest levels of honesty, vulnerability, and integrity, and would settle for nothing less than me becoming the best version of myself that I can become. He would be able to see me clearly—my positive attributes and the ones which need work—and generate experiences of self-growth to target these areas.
I’d also have to list his ability to generate true remorse in my heart via the use of a stern lecture (when warranted) ranking high on my list of things that make me go ooey gooey submissive. And, the obvious…his interest in using physical chastisement, such as spanking, mouth soaping, corner time, etc. to discipline me pushes me right over the edge into subspace…every.single.time.
Just a little insight into this girl’s submissive mindset.

Keep it kinky, my friends!
XOXO,
nora
When were you first spanked Nora?? I can’t remember if you‘ve ever written about it. I wonder how it came to be a sexual thrill for you.
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I’m not sure I have ever written a full post about it, but my first real spanking from a boyfriend was at age 21 or 22. He had been spanking me for fun, at my request, throughout our relationship. But, one night, I really pissed him off (I was feisty back then) and he put me over his knee and spanked me with his belt. It was so hot💋
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Hmmm. Feisty then… so nothing has really changed!
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LOL…good point😘💋❤
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I have a similar story with my boyfriend at the time. Now husband. So we were at a party at a sorority house in college. And we were up in this girls room. And I was really drunk (and I’m really feisty when drunk. Which is probably why my husband wants me sober) and I don’t remember what I said but it really pissed Sawyer off. And he grabbed this girl’s hair brush (one of those antique wooden ones) and he spanked the living daylights out of me. And then he asked me for my number and where my apartment was. I gave him my roommate’s number and the neighbor’s apartment. And he saw me stumble into my actual apartment. And my roommate gave him my number. And the next day he came over to apologize and ask me out. And my roommate said “he’s going to ask you out and if you don’t say yes, I will.” And the rest is history.
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LOL….sounds like an excellent introduction!
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Oh girl. It was. I had likes him for months. He was on the football team. My roommate and I thought he was SO CUTE! I relish that moment every time I see him.
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💋💋💋
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For me subspace is punishment, phrases ie. little girl, baby girl, little lady. Certain clothing items (or lack there of. And certain locations. Because for example work initiated dom space for me. (As my secretary once said: Mrs Gracie, you make grown men cry in the courtroom) But like the corner initiates sub space.
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You make an excellent point, Grace Marie! I forgot to include how being made to bare myself before a lecture, spanking, or before corner time has that same effect of igniting my submissive mindset. Thanks, girl!😘
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A good slap across the face will do it for me also. Plus hair pulling. ☺️☺️
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Ooooh…. I am a big fan of hair pulling! Especially when I am “thanking” my husband for disciplining me 😉
I have never actually been slapped across the face. I am curious about it, but my husband is not willing to do it…one of his hard limits.
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I could understand that. It is definitely more edgy then a swat. We started pretty small. It doesn’t take much to get a good sound. We have joked about what would happen if I had marks like are possible with a swat. Even a tiny red line would draw a lot of questions and judgements. Though we have found it is actually way harder than it seems to leave a mark on your face.
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Agreed, definitely more edgy. My Daddy is more than willing to leave handprints on my naughty behind though😊
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Mine too. Good thing!
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Yes, such a beautiful thing💋
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