Pleasure in the pain… #NSFW, 18+

Between the holidays, visiting family, birthdays, puppies, and selling a home, Daddy and I have had very little time for D/s.  Don’t get me wrong, the dynamic is always there, but the focus on it has been much less intense than previous months.  And, I was so busy, I didn’t even realize how much I was missing the intensity of his dominance. Until, Daddy told me calmly in his stern Daddy voice, that he felt I needed a spanking when we returned home… both as a release, and as a reminder of who I belong to.

My heart soared, and my tummy filled with butterflies upon hearing his words.  It had been almost a week since my maintenance spanking and I remembered how painful that had been.  I’m not sure if others experience this, but I’ve found that the less I am spanked, the more sensitive my bottom (and my emotions) become.

When we got home, Daddy helped me out of the truck and wrapped me in a tight hug.  He then took my hand, led me inside, and straight to our bedroom.  Without discussion, he unzipped my pants and lowered them to my knees.  I wasn’t wearing panties and the air felt cool between my legs, but my face flushed in embarrassment at being handled in this way.

“Lay on the bed, face down,” Daddy said, sternly.

“Yes, Sir,” I whispered, obeying immediately.

As I lay there, I thought of what was to come.  Why does this work for us?  Why do we both need this so much?  And…it’s going to hurt.

When Daddy returned, he held the short, thick strap, and the carpet beater… a tried and true recipe for a hot, stinging bottom and buckets of tears.

I immediately began begging, as I sometimes do when I see Daddy’s choice in implements.

“No, please, Daddy,” I said softly, knowing that nothing would deter him from the sound spanking he intended.

“I love you, nora, that is why I do this.  You need this,” he said, as he placed one hand upon my back, under my shirt, and the other on my naked backside.

I whispered back, “I know.  I love you too.”

And with that, Daddy began to spank my bottom with his hand.  These were not gentle, warm-up spanks as he sometimes starts with.  These were hard, crisp spanks designed to have me crying in record time.  This lasted for about one fire-hot minute before he stopped and picked up the strap.

This particular strap we bought from a sex shop in Las Vegas.  It is about 8 inches in length and is composed of two thick leather straps which form a point at the tips.  It is a small implement, but it packs one heck of a wallop.

I was begging for it to be over from the first lick.  The pain was incredibly intense as Daddy applied the strap liberally to my bottom and naked thighs.  He made a comment about how red I was becoming which I barely heard through the fog of pain.  The strapping seemed to go on forever, but in reality, was probably only a few minutes.

When Daddy set the strap down beside the bed, I looked up at him through a blur of tears.

“Please, Daddy…I’ve had enough, “I sobbed, as he rubbed my swollen rear.

“I decide when you have had enough, nora, and we are not nearly finished,” he told me, picking up the carpet beater. “You need this, honey.”

My spanking resumed, this time with the wicked carpet beater.  The strap had left me swollen and in tears, but the carpet beater produced an unbearable sting to which my body responded by kicking my legs and trying to cover my bottom with my hands.

Daddy gave me a warning to hold still and move my hands.  “Do I need to restrain you? “he asked.  I cried out “no”, knowing that this would only lead to a much longer and harder spanking than I already must endure and I moved my hands back above my head, gripping the pillow for support.

Daddy resumed my spanking and he didn’t stop until my tears were exhausted, and my body was still.  And then, he made me count out ten more. The pain had completely robbed me of energy and coherent-ness.  I lay there, pants at my knees, tears soaking my face, and my swollen and well-spanked bottom displayed before him.

Always gentle after a spanking, Daddy rubbed my back and kissed the back of my head.  As the pain began to somewhat subside, I thanked him for my spanking, as I am required to do.  Thoughts began to swirl through my mind…why do I allow him to do that to me?  I am a strong, confident, professional woman…why do I subject myself to my husband’s discipline?

I vocalized these thoughts to my husband, through my tears.

“Daddy, why do we need this so much?” I asked him, emotionally spent and lying face down on the bed still.

“We just do, baby girl,” he answered, lightly patting my bottom.

While it is difficult to explain, there is pleasure in the pain.  And, I thrive on this pain.

 

Happy writing, my friends…and thank you for stopping by! 🙂

Love, nora

46 thoughts on “Pleasure in the pain… #NSFW, 18+

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  1. I thought I was the only one who felt more sensitive after a period of absence! When HD spanked me Tuesday, I hadn’t had one in a month or so. It certainly felt stingier than what I recalled a spanking to be!

    I don’t know why HD and I need it either, but I think your daddy was very wise in his response. Some people just do. It’s a part of one’s genetic composition, in my opinion, as much as eye color. Some people crave vegetables, some crave cake. Some of us crave power-balanced relationships, some of us crave to submit or Dominate. Receive or give pain. Personally, I think the need for pain/administering pain stems from a base need for trust. Sometimes we need to know that the person we are with is so completely trustworthy, they can hurt us without harming us. We need to know that they know when to stop, they love and cherish us. It kinda seems counter-intuitive, but it’s about protection. They can give us what we need, they can protect us from ourselves in ways that we can’t do on our own. In the same way, Dominants need to be trusted that deeply. To know that the person under their hand (or carpet beater) knows their capabilities, trusts them to keep them safe. It’s hard to give someone pain, even when they want it. There’s a lot of personal questioning that happens, focusing on their reactions, deciding where to hit next and with what force, watching to see if they’ve had enough or need more. From my brief experience with Topping HD, it’s a humbling experience to see that someone has that kind of faith in you.

    I think I rambled enough, I hope I was clear. Sounds like you had quite an experience. The hugs and kisses and cuddling afterward are the absolute best part. 🙂

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Thank you for the incredibly thoughtful response, HeartsHope! I think you are definitely right…some of us are just wired this way. Spankings hurt so much, and when it is happening, I just want it to be over….but beforehand…it is all I want sometimes😊

      Liked by 3 people

    2. i love this response HH.

      it still feels a bit strange to me that i thank sayyid after spanking me, even a punishment one, but it stems from the fact that i know he cares enough to do this for me, to give me what i need in the moment. and trust does play a huge part in it.

      and yes, from my experience topping sayyid, has grown a great appreciation for his role in it.

      Liked by 4 people

  2. For me pain is somewhat cathartic and it lets all the whirling thoughts in my head just go still and quiet. I can find peace in it (rare for me because of my mental health) and it gives me the freedom to just let go. I only wish we didn’t have neighbors so Sir could give me proper spankings, although I don’t think I’d like the carpet beater. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Gave up on the “Why?” question years ago. Someone who is truly asking why, will typically not understand the answer. With one exception. Athletes get the concept of pain as a drug, a release, a palate cleanser.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Wonderful post, as always, Nora. I’ve been thinking about this a lot too lately, that desire for the pain. The release and submission. I think it’s something to do with the fact that, as adults, we’re expected to know everything – to take responsibility for everything. There is little training for how we do this, and all of us need that release, that thing that allows us to say “I’m surrendering everything here” to give in to not being responsible for everything just for a short break. Some people get drunk, others watch sport. And some give up control to someone they love with a spanker…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I’m playing catch up on your earlier posts. I agree with pretty much all of the above reasons for why we need the level of pain a spanking can bring us. For me personally it’s about head space. When I take a spanking it’s usually because I broke one of Gray’s rules or let my ‘I don’t give a damn’ attitude’ to life get the better of me. Gray has been my disciplinarian for a number of years on and off and is not a life partner but a devoted friend. He learnt early on that he was dealing with a wild card and noted that the stress levels in my life can be so far over the top he was worried I might stroke out if I didn’t get some relief from it all. He provides a way for me to arrive at my ‘head space’ where I finally get to go once I break through the pain barrier and submit to the spanking properly without fight or flight playing it’s part. I find it cleansing, therapeutic and cathartic to arrive at that space inside my own head. It is a rarity to get there and even rarer that I manage to stay there for any length of time. The harder the spanking, the better able I am to reach my space. I try to hold on to the empty head syndrome for a little while after the spanking is done but that’s still to this day a work in progress. Gray is very careful to make sure I am always in a good place after a heavy spanking or caning and we usually spend some time talking through the reasons either he or I decided I needed disciplining. One difference I experience to many of the comments here and your experience also, is that Gray does not like it if I thank him for spanking me. I did try once and he insisted that it was not good for me personally to be that submissive to him. In his words, ‘you are not a natural submissive by any stretch of the imagination and having to thank me for spanking you will eventually eat away at your natural warrior personality. For you it’s a step too far. I know you understand and appreciate what I do for you and that is good enough for me.’ We have never discussed it since and I never say thank you to him. I think he may have been very wise that day. My natural inclination is to carry my big sword and shield with me everywhere. I have a lot of, let’s just call them ‘loud discussions’ with professionals who believe they are more expert in my son’s care than I am after 30 years. I find it next to impossible to bow down to anyone. Gray recognised that in me very early on and factored it in to our dynamic. I would be lost without him. I think it’s simply a case of, if we need it we need it. 🙂 x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for this very thoughtful comment, Gemstrong! I think that you are quite fortunate to have such a good friend in Gray who understands what you need, and what you don’t need. Working in education, I greatly admire parents who are strong advocates, Warriors even, for their children who need assistance. Please know that you are admired!

      Like

  6. hush now woman, you are making this warrior woman blush! Thank you! I really appreciate that! You are right up there too you know. A lot of people can write spanking stories, but the reader has to be able to ‘feel’ those spanks too. Otherwise what’s the point? The segment I just read on your latest piece is very much one of those stories where the reader is there and feeling every single stroke of that tawse! Fabulous work. xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. By the way, I wanted to share that I worked in special education for ten years, and then later at county mental health clinic where I assisted disabled adults. I (obviously) don’t know what your son’s issues are, but I must tell you that I have a very soft place in my hearts for parents who find themselves caring for adult children. It is no wonder you have a warrior heart!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I may have taken down his story before you got the opportunity to read it from the sound of things. I did a series of posts about health care, disability and what it’s like living with disability in spite of the health care system and that led into telling his story from birth to 30! If you would like to read those posts I would be happy to email them to you. I didn’t feel comfortable keeping them on my blog due to the nature of the journals! It felt wrong. 🙂 x

        Liked by 1 person

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