Marriage & D/s, #NSFW, 18+ only

I think that I speak for both of us, when I say that neither Daddy nor I had any real clue about what we were getting ourselves into when we said “I do” all those years ago.  We began to learn about each other, about marriage, about commitment…together, one step at a time.  For the most part, we’ve had happy years but there have been trying times as well.  Times where one or the other of us were stretched so tightly that we thought we might break, or that our marriage might break.  But, we didn’t.  We kept at it, every single day…and I am proud to say that we have a marriage built on friendship, passion, trust, and mutual respect.

When I think about the journey we have been on, the way we have exchanged power roles and incorporated Domestic Discipline (DD) and Dominance and submission (D/s) into our relationship, I realize that once again, we had no idea what we were getting into!  Just as marriage isn’t always easy, as we are learning, neither is a 24/7, D/s dynamic.  It takes a lot of hard work on both sides and there are ups and downs throughout the process.

As of late, Daddy and I have both been struggling in our new roles.  I haven’t written about it much as I wasn’t sure how to articulate what the problem was.  But, after many long conversations with Daddy and much self-reflection, we have figured out, together, what was happening…we were reverting back to our old roles, prior to D/s!  Even though Daddy was standing there with a paddle in his hand, and I was kneeling, nude before him…we were reverting back to old, unhealthy thinking patterns.  Specifically, I was beginning to resort to a very nasty habit of mine…the habit of criticizing.  While I was being critical, for the most part silently in my own mind, I was beginning to criticize everything Daddy did…especially how he was handling me and our D/s.   And, in turn, Daddy was becoming more than comfortable with me topping from the bottom again, allowing me to lead our marriage and our lives again, but then resenting me for it and withdrawing emotionally.  As a dear submissive friend taught me, I was not feeding Daddy’s Dominance and he was not feeding my submission.

This struggle went on for a few weeks before we figured it out.  After figuring out what was happening, and tired of my topping from the bottom, Daddy informed me that we were going to have a re-set session and that he was no longer going to tolerate ANY misbehavior on my part.  He warned me that he was going to be incredibly strict with me.  The scathing lecture that he then proceeded to give me brought me to tears and left me begging for a chance to be his good girl again.  He then told me that my regularly scheduled maintenance spanking was going to be much more severe than what he typically gives me as a weekly reminder.  He ordered me up out of my chair and to wait for him by the ottoman, with my skirt up and panties down.

When he returned to the living room with my cuffs, a link, and the heavy wooden paddle, I had no doubt that he meant business.  He began by placing my cuffs on each wrist and linking them together.  He told me this was because he intended to spank me longer and harder than ever before and that he didn’t want me to hurt myself by reaching back.  He bent me over the ottoman, my bare bottom under his paddle.  He commanded me to tell him who he was, to which I replied, “My Husband and my Daddy” as he has taught me.  With that said, he began to paddle me hard and fast.  He has never spanked me with such intensity and that is saying a lot as he has delivered some pretty painful spankings to my behind.  About 50 swats in (I was trying to keep count through the tears), he asked me again, “Who am I?” and I cried out that he was “my Husband and my Daddy”.  Ten more swats, same question.  Another set, same question.  After roughly 100 swats, he put his paddle down, and asked me, “and who are you?” to which I sobbed, “I am Daddy’s obedient, baby girl”.  He then asked, “Are you going to obey me this week?” to which I instantly gave a very heartfelt, “Yes, Sir!”.

What happened next was another surprise on Daddy’s end.  Typically, after a maintenance spanking, Daddy puts me in the corner for about 15 minutes to reflect on how I would like to behave throughout the week.  Instead, he brought out the punishment stool, placed my bare behind on it, leaving my cuffs linked in place.  He faced my stool toward him, and he sat down to watch an episode of his favorite show.  When he would look at me during a commercial break,  I felt completely humiliated…sitting there on my well-spanked bottom on this tiny stool, panties down, and tears streaking down my face.  I didn’t dare ask to be released from the punishment stool but kept my mouth shut and my bottom in place.

When his show ended, Daddy came to me and un-linked my cuffs.  He helped me up and into his arms.  He told me that he hated having to discipline me that way but that he wasn’t going to let either of us revert to our old ways.  He promised me that he would lead and that I would follow, and that if I didn’t, we would have a repeat of what had just transpired.  I just about melted into his arms, overwhelmed with contrition, and the beautiful submissive feeling I had toward the man.  We continued on to have a wonderful evening together, and a very nice, and might I mention, sexy, day today.

It feels that all is right in the world again.  I have no doubt that we will struggle at times as we continue to learn these new dynamics…but I also know that as long as we communicate about what is happening, and trust in one another, we will continue to experience the beautiful benefits that come along with this lifestyle.

P.S.  My “seat” of learning is very sore today!

Thank you for stopping by and happy writing 🙂

~ nora