30 Days of Submission- Day 4

30 Days of Submission- Day 4

Do you switch into a dominant role at any time? If you are in a domestic discipline relationship, are there things that you maintain control over? Are you a “switch” in BDSM terms? If not, have you ever thought about it or given thought to why it’s not for you?

I would describe myself as the submissive in my marriage.  My husband is our leader, my Dominant, and it is my promise to obey and submit to him in all ways.  At times, like most submissives I would imagine, I do have to take on a leadership (dominant) role.  This primarily happens while I am at work, though in our home, I do still maintain control over some aspects of our household.

While I have always managed my husband and I’s finances, when we began to incorporate domestic discipline and my husband became the head of our household (HOH), it was a conversation that we revisited.  It was suggested in the book, The Surrendered Wife, that the wife submit to her husband in all matters financial, demonstrating her complete faith in his abilities.  However, my husband has no desire to take on this task, on top of everything else he does for us.  Becoming the Dominant in our marriage, the HOH, my Daddy… is already a lot of responsibility and that doesn’t even include his full-time career, our 5-acre property, and our fixer-upper home that we are constantly remodeling ourselves.  While he decided to be more aware of how I was managing our money, he has opted to allow me to remain in control of the balancing, budgeting, and paying of bills for now.  Although, any investment decisions will be made together.

I must admit, however; that the idea of being a “switch” is intriguing to me in some ways.  I have a naturally dominant personality, and submission is not something that I come by easily.  It has taken 8 months’ worth of constant attention and correction (spankings!) from my Daddy to get me anywhere near as submissive as we would both like me to be, and I feel that I still have a long way to go.  While I have no interest in dominating my husband, I do at times fantasize about possibly dominating another female.  This is a topic that my friend and fellow blogger, furcissy, and I have explored to some degree in our communication exchanges.  Upon much reflection, I feel that this particular inkling will remain a fantasy as Daddy and I are not willing to take the risk of introducing a third partner into our marriage.  But, as we all know…sometimes the fantasy of something is more fun than the reality 🙂

In time, I hope to be able to say that I have become the submissive that I set out on this journey to be.  I still feel that I am in my infantile stages of this process, as I focus on changing my thought processes and my behaviors, and my very state of being.  I feel that I am still in the cocoon of learning but hope to emerge, beautiful and newly set free as my submissive self.

I love you, Daddy.

Always, nora