Lately, Daddy and I have really gotten caught up in our D/s dynamic…rituals, sexual submission, trying new things at a rapid pace, etc. While exploring ourselves sexually has been incredible (emphasize the incredible part), we have really gotten away from the original reason that Daddy and I embarked on this journey in the first place. That reason was to change our marriage for the better…to encourage my submission to my husband and to encourage my husband to be a stronger leader in our marriage. We decided to accomplish that goal through a strong commitment to both of our new roles.
As I mentioned, we have gotten really caught up in our sex life (not necessarily a bad thing). However, outside of the bedroom, our roles began to slowly revert back to our old selves. I could feel myself becoming overly critical again. Daddy was beginning to feel defensive constantly and engage in avoidance behaviors. We had two arguments last week over STUPID things.
Thankfully, we both recognized what was happening. We agreed to discuss things when my husband returned from work tonight. My assignment was to think about things, create a list of punishments we would review, and write down transgressions that I had yet to be punished for. The list of punishments that I created (and Daddy approved this evening) are:
- Strap/ruler to palms
- Mouth washing with soap
- Large plug (at home or public)
- Corner Time
- Nose pressed against wall
- Punishment stool
- Sent to bed early
- Writing lines
- Grounded to the house
- Internet sites (WordPress, etc.)
- Alcohol or Coffee
- Speaking (use of bit)
- Sitting on furniture
Daddy and I reviewed this list together and he thanked me for putting this down in writing. We also decided that I would keep a list of transgressions daily and record my punishments, to bring more focus to behavior modification. I also shared with Daddy three transgressions which I had yet to be punished for. One of the transgressions included spending too much time on the internet and not enough time dedicated to my academic writing. For this, Daddy has restricted me from WordPress tomorrow (I will miss reading all of your blogs with my morning coffee!). I was surprised at how it felt when Daddy announced this as my punishment…I actually teared up and felt very, very sorry that I had not used my time more wisely. I suppose that means it is an effective punishment. Daddy wanted time to consider my other two transgressions and I do not know yet how I will be punished.
Overall, from our discussion, we both came away wanting a total re-commitment to our DD lifestyle. Daddy has stated that he would like to be more consistent, apply more on-the-spot corrections, and be more proactive in helping me learn to be submissive. I stated that I wanted to continue to work on not only behaving more submissively but also on thinking more submissively and that I would follow his lead and obey his decisions in these matters.
I have come to believe that life is mostly about hard work and fun. Daddy and I really got caught up in the fun of D/s…now it is time to start putting the hard work in again, so that we can enjoy the benefits of a happier, less stressful marriage. Don’t get me wrong, I hope the kinky sex stuff keeps up as well, but I have a feeling I may be sleeping on my tummy the next few night….
Happy writing, all! See you Thursday 🙂