Reflecting on 30 Days of D/s- Day 28

Reflecting on 30 Days of D/s- Day 28

Hello fellow bloggers! I have decided to partake in the 30 Days of D/s, which I will utilize as a writing exercise, presented by John Brownstone and Kayla Lords at Loving BDSM.  As suggested by the title, this free activity explores topics surrounding D/s relationships.  I know that there are many of us in this particular circle of writers who are engaged in this writing activity at the moment, so bear with me.  I think that this will be a useful endeavor in further exploring this new lifestyle that Daddy and I have set out on.  As always, thank you for reading!

~nora

Loving BDSM’s 30 Days of D/s – Day 28

Prompt: D/s is a power exchange relationship. It’s also a kink, but it’s not the only kink out there. In your D/s relationship, in order to keep it healthy and vibrant, you’ve both got to grow – together. Part of this might be in exploring your kinks together. Today, if you’re in a relationship, it may be time to talk about kinks you’d both like to try but haven’t yet. Find what aligns or what you both find interesting and start exploring. If you’re single, make a list of the kinky things you’d like to try with a partner.

I’ve been aware of my kinky preferences since I was in my early teens.  Seeing the bare bottom of a female being spanked has always turned me on.  I remember that even younger than that, I would draw cartoons of spankings and I would read and re-read parts of books in which a spanking took place.  So, soon after I met my future husband, I told him that I fantasized about spanking.  He gladly took me over his knee and gave me what would be one of the first of many spankings to come.  But, back then, Daddy gave me sexy spankings.  That’s not the case anymore since we implemented domestic discipline into our marriage.  While I still love fantasizing about spankings…actually getting them is not so fun.

Over the last six months, Daddy and I have begun to explore other kinky activities.  We’ve used nipple clamps, various vibrators and dildos, and anal toys.  He’s restrained me at times using cuffs and/or the spreader bar.  We’ve experimented with a few scenes and tried things that are a little more volatile, like when Daddy fucked my face with his cock.  It has all been very sexually stimulating and satisfying.  But most of this play has centered around my desire to explore new kink and Daddy has happily obliged.

When I ask Daddy about his sexual fantasies, it centers around one particular activity…the threesome. Just Daddy, me, and another willing female who will be our little sex kitten.  However, Daddy and I decided long ago that we did not want to actually include another female into our sex life.  We have seen two other couples decide to experiment with this, the results of that decision, and decided that it just wasn’t worth the risk to our marriage, despite how fun it would probably be.  But, I really want to give Daddy his fantasy so it is something that I bring up from time to time and he still firmly tells me no.  What he does allow me to do is to whisper his fantasies in his ear while we are making love.  While riding or stroking his thick shaft I’ll paint a picture for him in his mind of two naughty girls face down on the bed, one being pummeled by his hard cock while he finger fucks the other.  Or, me being tied up while he sucks on my nipple and plays with my clit, while she kneels before him sucking him off.  He LOVES those stories.  But still, I can’t help but want to give him the real thing.

To date, this is the only fantasy I have been able to wriggle out of Daddy, but I know he must have others.  I am hoping tonight to propose that we do just what this prompt suggests and sit down together and make a list of kinks or fantasies we’d each like to explore.  What could be more fun than that?

I guess that was a silly question.  Going down the list and actually doing each of the kinky activities we come up with would definitely be more fun!

Happy writing 🙂

nora

 

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12 thoughts on “Reflecting on 30 Days of D/s- Day 28

  1. One of the many side benefits of D/s is the ease with which honest conversations can take place, including all those fantasies that lurk in the deep recesses of the mind. Hope you have a very fun and kinky evening.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you for sharing, Nora.

    Including that elusive 3rd party is pretty much the only sexual fantasy I have had but not experienced yet. Even with boundaries in place there are immense risks and finding someone who is a good fit is incredibly difficult.

    I think when we fantasize it is either someone fairly anonymous or someone that fits absolutely perfect… which unfortunately is rarely how things actually work.

    I am also certain that he probably has some deep and dark fantasies that he has yet to come to terms with. It will be interesting to see how that plays out down the road.

    Take care.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for the response, furcissy! I agree that including that third party can subject you to risk, and that is why we most likely will never try it. I am hoping that he and I will be able to talk about his fantasies. D/s has made us more intimate than ever, but my husband struggles opening himself up, especially if it makes him feel vulnerable. We shall see…

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Thank you, Nora.

        Something that doesn’t get talked about too often is the double-standard that exists for sexual fantasies when it comes to gender. It is an odd one that I may blog about here soon but basically…
        Men are expected to look at porn. They are supposed to be able to admit to this to their locker room buddies but face shame and ridicule from the world at large.

        Women are not supposed to look at porn. Women meant to look at erotica and fantasize deeply on an emotional level. There is nothing wrong with this at all.

        The end result is that when a woman shares her fantasies she is seen as experimental, kinky, or open. When a man shares his fantasies he is seen as a pervert, deviant, and pariah. I see this as the giant hurdle that exists and it may take a lot of work on your end for him to feel comfortable divulging that side. Men are trained to fear ridicule, rejection, and the like and it can be truly difficult to let that wall down.

        Take care.

        Liked by 2 people

  3. I hope you were able to talk about these things. There is a bdsm checklist out there that will make your head spin, but will bring up things you have never thought of. Might be fun to do together. We fantasize together all the time. If we ever try adding someone or a couple to our bed, it will be when we are away from home at a vacation spot. That way we can leave it behind when we return home!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is a good idea, collaredmichael! Daddy and I have discussed something similar…definitely don’t want to bring someone else into our home. We did talk last night but he just really isn’t open to sharing and I need to accept that. Either he really is just that vanilla, or, his fantasies deviate so far from the norm he just isn’t comfortable enough to share. Either way, he assures me he is happy with our sex life and all the exploring we’ve been doing and that felt genuine.

      Liked by 1 person

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