Hello fellow bloggers! I have decided to partake in the 30 Days of D/s, which I will utilize as a writing exercise, presented by John Brownstone and Kayla Lords at Loving BDSM. As suggested by the title, this free activity explores topics surrounding D/s relationships. I know that there are many of us in this particular circle of writers who are engaged in this writing activity at the moment, so bear with me. I think that this will be a useful endeavor in further exploring this new lifestyle that Daddy and I have set out on. As always, thank you for reading!
Loving BDSM’s 30 Days of D/s – Day 26
Prompt: Much like rules and other negotiated parts of your D/s relationship, you may want to incorporate tasks and rituals. Rules dictate behavior: behave this way, don’t do that, always do this. Tasks and rituals are often things you do for your partner or as a way to bring yourself (individually or together) back into your mental, emotional, and even physical D/s space. Tasks and rituals become more important as vanilla life interferes in your kinky one. These can be the things that make you feel your most Dominant or submissive self.
Can you think of tasks or rituals you already have or some you think you’d like to have that could be incorporated in a current or future D/s relationship?
Tasks and rituals are beginning to find their place within Daddy and I’s new dynamic (I suppose it’s not that new anymore as we near the six-month mark). In the beginning, when we began to incorporate domestic discipline into our marriage, it was mostly about the rules…always be respectful, obey immediately, and strive to please Daddy in all ways. If I broke the rules, I was disciplined. However, as we have begun to explore D/s, and the idea of Daddy as a Dominant and myself as a submissive, tasks and rituals began to emerge. This is something that we both really enjoy as we feel it reaffirms my position in our marriage as his “baby girl” and as his “submissive” and it reaffirms my husband’s position in our marriage as my “Daddy” and as my “Dominant”.
Some of the tasks we have incorporated are exercises that were always there, but now, are given as assignments to be completed. Daddy typically texts me each morning after he has arrived at work and will give me a list of tasks to complete during the day. This may include cleaning tasks, running errands, etc. or may be something like “relax and watch a movie” or “take a long bath”. I will also list writing lines as a task as Daddy often assigns lines as a way of reaffirming my submissive status and mindset. We have also begun to incorporate some rituals to reaffirm our status as Dominant and submissive. One new ritual involves kneeling when I need to say something to Daddy which is in contrast with something he has said. For example, yesterday we were working on an art project together and he wanted to proceed in a way that I disagreed with. So, I requested permission to kneel, kneeled before him upon being granted permission, and stated what I thought and why it might work better. Daddy thought about it, was pleased with my behavior, and we continued on with the project. In the past, differences of opinions during projects often led to a fight. This new ritual reminds me to communicate respectfully and it helps Daddy feel less defensive if I don’t agree with his opinion. Another activity that has now become a ritual is Daddy’s nightly foot massage. I keep foot balm by the couch and each night I kneel before Daddy, breasts bared, and rub his feet. He loves this! I do too, though I am desperate to earn a foot massage from Daddy (I’ll write a post on that at some point…but basically, Daddy has offered a foot massage as a positive incentive for good behavior which I have yet to earn). The last ritual that we have implemented is nightly kneeling by the bed. When I am sent to bed, I am to kneel, nude, on Daddy’s side of the bed and wait for him. When he enters and asks the question, “Yes?”, I am to respectfully request, “May I please have permission to sleep in our bed with you tonight, Daddy?”. I LOVE this new ritual and I love how proud it makes Daddy of me each night. As he tucks me in, he tells me how much he loves me and how proud he is of how far I have come…it is a beautiful way to drift off to sleep.
The tasks and rituals that we have implemented continue to enhance our new found dynamic and our intimacy as man and wife. It may seem silly but I am greatly looking forward to kneeling in the evenings for Daddy this weekend in our trailer while we are camping. For me, it serves as a great reminder that he is Daddy, wherever we are… and I find that thrilling. Love you Daddy!
Happy writing 🙂