Hello fellow bloggers! I have decided to partake in the 30 Days of D/s, which I will utilize as a writing exercise, presented by John Brownstone and Kayla Lords at Loving BDSM. As suggested by the title, this free activity explores topics surrounding D/s relationships. I know that there are many of us in this particular circle of writers who are engaged in this writing activity at the moment, so bear with me. I think that this will be a useful endeavor in further exploring this new lifestyle that Daddy and I have set out on. As always, thank you for reading!
~nora
Loving BDSM’s 30 Days of D/s – Day 03
Beyond the basic title of Dominant or submissive, are there other titles you prefer or are interested in exploring? Are there any that turn you off or don’t seem like a good fit for you?
When considering titles, I reflect on other titles that Daddy and I have had during our remarkable 14 years together. When we first began, it was boyfriend/girlfriend which soon led to fiancé on our first-year anniversary, after my husband’s beautiful marriage proposal. Two years after that we became husband and wife, we were best friends, and sometimes described ourselves as soul mates. I reflect on the hard times, where we briefly described ourselves as “separated”. I hated that particular label and am grateful that we found our way back to one another quickly, losing very little time together but being forced to see that we each had to change a bit to make our marriage work.
Today, living our new lifestyle which includes elements of D/s and DD, the way that I conceptualize him in my mind is either “Husband” or “Daddy”. He typically refers to me as “My Wife”, his “Baby girl”, and his “Good Little Girl”. It is very infrequent that we use “Dominant” or “Submissive” as titles, but more as descriptors. For example, he might say that he would like me to work on being more “submissive” to him. Or, I may ask him to “dominate” me on a particular evening, which usually includes discipline, humiliation, and anal play.
What I yearn for is to be Daddy’s little girl. I realized recently that I may identify as a “little”. I absolutely glow inside when he refers to me as “his good little girl” or his “little one” or “baby girl”. In reflecting on this further, I have realized that I am not interested in age play and that I don’t identify as a specific age from childhood. But, what I long for is to be taken care of, provided for, guided, disciplined when I misbehave, and to have that feeling of safety that comes from being under Daddy’s protection, of being Daddy’s little girl.
As I address this post, I realize that Daddy and I have not spent much time talking about labels and what they mean to us. I know that he loves that I call him Daddy, but I have realized in writing this that I don’t know exactly why (and I want to find out!). I send a big thank you out to John Brownstone and Kayla Lords for providing this prompt as I know that this will lead to a very insightful conversation between my Daddy and I, providing a deeper understanding of our dynamic.
Words are very powerful only when we allow them to define us. Titles and labels are not who we actually are.
It’s interesting how being called little girl equals protection for you. There is something about the word Daddy that means much more than biological male parent. I wonder how he feels about that title, other than feeling good.
Being a little is not about ageplay, or a stuffie or two, or dressing a certain way, it’s about feeling safe with your Big.
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Thank you, LS! I look forward to talking with Daddy about this😊
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Make sure you ask in a proper manner though. Daddies get impatient when being nagged. 🙂
‘Tell me! Tell me! What’s in the bag? Is it for me? Is it pink and sparkly?’
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Lol…will do😊
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Introspection can lead to mental breakthroughs. Hopefully your conversation with your Daddy will be mutually rewarding. All the best!
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Thank you, collaredmichael!!!
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I would probably agree with feeling the same way that you have described. My Husband often uses all those same terms and they are very special to me. He also prefers I call him Daddy. We don’t do any age play and I don’t think I would relate to that but the concept of being cared for and protected, yes. I was very unprotected as a child. I feel my Husband fulfills that need and he is a good father himself as well.
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Thank you for sharing, Obedient Wife! I am glad he is a good Daddy, and a good father to your children as well 🙂
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I can definitely identify with this especially the fourth paragraph I’m feeling loved and protected, I don’t call my Dom I wanted to it first) but he really doesn’t like it,but I’ve gotten used to calling him Master and have come to realize that he’s still just as protective as he would be if he were called Daddy so I’m very content now😊
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That is wonderful, bobbijeanj! It sounds like your Master makes you feel very safe and secure 🙂
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